Dealing with Telemarketers

I am actually pretty easy going about telemarketers. I think they should get different jobs, obviously…but I guess if that’s all they are equipped to do, then, OK. But don’t keep calling me after I have asked to be taken off your list.

It has been going on for weeks. A number I can’t call back, because it shows up as “Name Withheld” with a phone number of 1-423-1, keeps calling me. I answer, they ask for me BY NAME, and tell me they want to send me the insurance quotes I have asked for and would I verify my mailing address. They HAVE my damn mailing address!! AND my name and phone number, obviously. I refuse to verify this, because I never ASKED for any “insurance quotes”. The first time they called I told the man no, I would not be verifying anything and please remove me from his list. He said he would. Lying @$$hole.

They call every day or so. I repeated my request 4 times and then stop answering. Then? I got pissed. They won’t stop calling!! A few days ago, this happened and I answered, I again, in a not very polite way, asked them to The guy hung up on me and I thought that was that. My DH laughed and reminded me of HIS answer to scamming telemarketers. I laughed too and told him if they called back, I would do the same thing.

They called back a couple days later while I was in the car driving. I picked up the phone and I looked at him, then said, “Get ready…” I answered the phone…the man called me by name…

And I screamed bloody murder as loud as I could for as long as I could. Then I hung up.

My DH and I laughed like lunatics for a full five minutes. I figured that would get me off the list. Apparently? It got me moved to somebody else’s list.

Today they called three times in a row. My DH and I were studying in our library. The first time, I looked at him and said, “Sorry…” then answered, listened for the guy to call me by name, then I screamed my head off. We laughed like loons when I hung up, cuz the cat does not understand my new way of answering the phone, and in fact had never heard a sound like that from me. He jumped four feet straight up from a soundly sleeping curl position, and shot himself like a bullet across the room, where he stared at me with eyes the size of saucers. Poor baby.

Then the guy called back!! I did it again. Shook my head, cuz…what an idiot. He must not realize…American women are pretty sturdy. We can scream loud, and a LOT. Maybe Indian women don’t do this. The third time sounded like a different person, and I pictured them passing the headset around…I screamed as loud as I have ever screamed with all my breath. Then my DH and I collapsed into hysteria as we have both worked in call center situations and knew how they must be flummoxed over this response.

They haven’t called back, yet. I kind of hope they do. First, it was kind of fun and relieved a LOT of stress. Sort of an excuse to behave badly. Second, I want a chance to TELL them up front that if they KEEP calling, I am GOING TO keep screaming. I never thought to do that before, and I want a chance to perfect my system. Third, it might be kind of fun to get their reaction to the upfront warning. Will they hang up on me first…or wait to see if I will follow through? Should be interesting. I will update when I have more.

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